Awesome Marriage Podcast

How are physical health and marital intimacy connected—and why does it matter more than we often realize?
In this episode, Dr. Kim and Mrs.Nancy sit down for an honest conversation about the link between physical health and intimacy in marriage. They explore how stress, exhaustion, illness, aging, and life seasons can impact connection, desire, and closeness—and why caring for our bodies is not just personal, but relational and spiritual.
This conversation helps couples navigate physical barriers to intimacy without shame or pressure, and instead with patience, understanding, and love. Whether you're in a season of strength or struggle, this episode offers hope, clarity, and encouragement to pursue intimacy the way God designed it—rooted in grace and mutual care.
You'll hear:
• Why intimacy doesn't stay effortless—and why that's normal
• How sleep deprivation, stress, and hormones impact desire and connection
• Why exhaustion often gets misread as rejection
• How physical neglect creates emotional distance
• What stewardship of your body has to do with loving your spouse
• How couples can talk about intimacy without shame or defensiveness
• Practical, realistic steps to rebuild closeness—even in demanding seasons
 
Quotes from This Episode:
Often as women, we feel like we have to do it all. We become physically drained and spiritually drained. -Mrs. Nancy
Our bodies aren't machines. They need to be connected to the Lord and good health. -Mrs. Nancy
We have to get past the stereotype that if you love each other that your sexual intimacy will be great. - Dr. Kim
Body, soul and spirit- you have to work on all three to get yourself in shape, to live life to the fullest. - Mrs. Nancy
The better I feel, the better I take care of myself, one our marriage is better, and two I have the energy and focus to serve Him and do the things God has lined out for me to do. -Dr. Kim
Physical health and marriage are more connected than we realize. When one suffers, the other does too—care for both intentionally. -Dr. Kim
You don't have to be 'super mom' or 'super spouse.' Recognize your limits and give yourself grace in each season of life.- Dr. Kim
Taking care of your health is not just self-improvement—it's an act of love toward your spouse and those you serve. -Dr. Kim
Even in illness, exhaustion, or stress, don't give up on intimacy. Adapt, support each other, and let these challenges draw you closer.-Dr. Kim
You don't need a perfect body—just a healthy one that lets you show up for your spouse and God's call each day.-Dr. Kim
Fitness is about being strong enough to live, love, and serve as God intended—not about looking a certain way.-Dr. Kim
 
Questions for Conversation:
How has our current physical season (energy, stress, health, sleep, life stage) been shaping our intimacy—emotionally and physically—and where do we need more understanding for each other?



Are there any physical or emotional barriers to intimacy that we've avoided talking about? What would it look like to approach that conversation with curiosity, prayer, and grace instead of pressure or defensiveness?



What is one small, realistic way we could care for our physical health together this season as an act of love and connection—not obligation?

 
Mentioned in this Episode:
Dr. Kim mentioned rating your intimacy in order to open the door to communication. We have a great tool for that! Check out our Love Making Survey.
Awesome Marriage is on Instagram!Make sex better for BOTH of you — by romancing your spouse the way they actually desire. Check out this month's Sexy Bundle: His and Hers Romance
Want an opportunity to dig into God's Word with your spouse? Find Awesome Marriage on YouVersion. Want to see what God's Word says about sex and intimacy? Check out Embracing the Gift of Sex in Marriage: Looking Through a Biblical Lens Part 1
If you haven't browsed our site, you've GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 
Sign up for Dr. Kim's Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!
Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. Join now, just in time to receive our Sexy Bundle: His and Hers Romance

In this episode, I'm joined by Lindsey to talk about her newest book, Don't Burn Your Own House Down—a powerful and practical guide for couples who want to stop self-sabotaging their marriage and learn how to protect what matters most. We unpack how unhealthy rhythms, unmet expectations, loneliness, and emotional struggles can quietly fuel disconnection, and why waiting for your spouse to "fix it" first often makes things worse. Whether your marriage is thriving or struggling, this conversation offers honest insight and hopeful tools to help you fireproof your relationship and pursue deeper connection in every season.
 
Episode Takeaways
Most marital damage is unintentional but preventable.
Self-sabotage shows up in everyday habits.
Waiting for your spouse to change first keeps couples stuck.
Behavior change alone isn't enough.
Healthy marriages are intentionally "fireproofed."
 
Quotes from this Episode:
Most couples don't fall apart because they stop caring. They fall apart because they stop considering each other in the little, everyday moments.
Playfulness isn't a luxury—it's an essential ingredient for a thriving, connected marriage.
Outdo each other in showing honor, and watch how your marriage flourishes.
Scorekeeping in marriage poisons connection.
If it needs to start with you, let it start with you. Your reward isn't just in the result—it's in the faithfulness and honor you show, even when it's hard.
In every word and action toward your spouse, you either speak life or spit poison.
When Jesus is at the center of your marriage, your own pride and hurts matter less—making way for unity, healing, and lasting love.
 
Take time to Reflect:
What little fire are you ignoring today? 
Are you believing the lie that it's your spouse's job to take the first step? 
What is one small change we could make this week to protect our connection?



Mentioned in this Episode:
Don't Burn Your Own House Down by Lindsey Maestas

Lindsey is on Instagram!

Awesome Marriage is on Instagram!

Make sex better for BOTH of you — by romancing your spouse the way they actually desire. Check out this month's Sexy Bundle: His and Hers Romance

Want an opportunity to dig into God's Word with your spouse? Find Awesome Marriage on YouVersion. Want to see what God's Word says about sex and intimacy? Check out Embracing the Gift of Sex in Marriage: Looking Through a Biblical Lens Part 1

If you haven't browsed our site, you've GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

Sign up for Dr. Kim's Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. Join now, just in time to receive our Sexy Bundle: His and Hers Romance

You all loved this conversation in the fall so we are kicking off our Wider Lens 2026 with a rerelease of this awesome interview. Jerry Flowers is bringing encouragement about the patterns of your life and posture of your heart as we talk through his new book Heart Rehab: Finding the You God Created You to Be. Lean into the discomfort, create disciplines for preparedness, and surrender your need for control in order to step into your true calling as a son or daughter of the Lord Almighty. He loves you, he is for you, and we can trust him with our hearts!
 
Episode Highlights:
Stop blaming everyone else. Take time for self reflection. 
If we invite God in, He can use all seasons for our good and growth.
Intimacy with the Lord allows us to grow into the people God created us to be. 
Discipline and preparation go hand in hand. The more disciplined you are, the more prepared you are for what God has next. 
Culture influences us to mislabel our fears, thoughts and anxieties. Make sure you are labeling them correctly.
 
 
Quotes from Today's Episode:
I recognize many times, our placement in life isn't just because of problems, it's because of patterns. -Jerry Flowers
Patterns reveal character. -Jerry Flowers
Patterns are one of the ushers to certain seasons. -Jerry Flowers
We want to blame the enemy, but we have to look at ourselves too. -Jerry Flowers
Be aware of the enemy, for sure. But I think sometimes that keeps us from taking responsibility for our part. -Jerry Flowers
It may not make sense right then, but later it'll make sense. -Jerry Flowers
I see things that God put me through, before we got married, that helped me when I got married. -Dr. Kim
We want to be whole enough where the Lord can pour into us and we can pour back out.- Jerry Flowers
If you want results, you lean into discomfort.- Jerry Flowers
What changed for me is realizing that my mind can lie to me. -Jerry Flowers




A Wider Lens: Questions for Self Reflection
Look at your daily life and identify one unhealthy pattern you've grown comfortable with.




What one discipline could you start practicing to combat this pattern and prepare for what God has next?




Identify an area of your life you haven't fully surrendered to the Lord. Choose a Scripture verse to meditate on as you commit to trusting Him completely.




Mentioned in this Episode:
Website: Jerryflowersministries.com ; redefinedtv.net

Facebook: facebook.com/JerryFlowersMinistries ; facebook.com/@redefinedtv

Instagram: instagram.com/jerryflowers.jr ; instagram.com/redefinedtv

YouTube: youtube.com/@Beredefined

TikTok: tiktok.com/@jerryflowers.jr

Heart Rehab: Finding the You God Created You to Be

Marriage is one of the most meaningful relationships we experience—but when mental health struggles enter the picture, it can feel overwhelming for both spouses. In this episode, we dive into how mental health impacts the overall health of a marriage, what couples are really facing today, and why caring for your own emotional well-being is essential for a thriving relationship.
Drawing from counseling experience and faith-based wisdom, we address common misconceptions, signs that mental health is affecting your marriage, and practical ways to support a struggling spouse without losing yourself in the process. You'll also hear encouragement for couples navigating anxiety, stress, or depression, guidance on boundaries and self-care, and insight on when to seek professional help. This honest and hope-filled conversation offers tools to help couples stay connected—even in difficult seasons.



Episode Highlights:
Mental health struggles distort how we see things.
How to identify red flags that your spouse may be dealing with something deeper.
How to recognize the difference in support and rescue.
Encouragement to remain present in the difficult season.
 
Quotes from This Episode:
You can't build intimacy from survival mode.
Anxiety tells you everything is a threat and depression tells you nothing is going to get better.
Resentment builds when the healthier spouse feels like they are carrying the whole load.
Your job is to walk alongside your spouse, not carry them. 
This is a season, not a sentence.
 
Talk it Over Together:
What helps you feel emotionally supported by me when you're struggling?

Are there topics, emotions, or struggles you find hard to share with me? What makes them difficult?

How can we check in with each other more intentionally moving forward?




Mentioned in This Episode:
Awesome Marriage is on Instagram!

Marriage need a reset so you can reconnect? This month's 4 Week Connection Challenge helps you and your spouse intentionally reconnect emotionally, physically, and spiritually—one simple, meaningful step at a time. Start closing the distance and rebuilding the intimacy you're longing for today.

Want an opportunity to dig into God's Word with your spouse? Find Awesome Marriage on YouVersion. Want to see what God's Word says about having an Awesome Marriage. Check out 7 Secrets to an Awesome Marriage.

If you haven't browsed our site, you've GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

Sign up for Dr. Kim's Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. Join now, just in time to receive our 4 Week Connection Challenge.

I'm so thrilled to have Dr. Kelly Flanagan back on the show. Today he is talking about his newest book The Road Less Triggered, focusing on the importance of recognizing and managing emotional triggers in relationships. The work of faith, self awareness, and compassion is vital in our relationships. Dr. Flanagan shares how to stay engaged, remain soft, and practically manage conflict in a way that brings connection to your marriage.



Episode Highlights:
Understanding Triggered Moments in Relationships
Your body is an early warning system
Living in the security of God's unconditional love provides a foundation of safety.
The posture of your heart affects how you receive communication.



Quotes from This Episode:
Most relationship conflict isn't like D-Day—it's more like Groundhog Day. We keep repeating the same patterns until we decide to break the cycle.
The heart of this work is restoring a sense of choice—the power to keep your heart open, even when you're triggered and it feels impossible.
A response is the fruit of self-regulation. A reaction is a failure of self-regulation.
You can't connect if you're protecting. Openness is required for real connection.
Our culture pushes us to blame others, but real progress comes from taking personal responsibility for how we show up.
Until we move out of being triggered and back into connection mode, we'll keep self-sabotaging every attempt to connect.
Becoming a safe environment for the people you love inspires them to open their own hearts—and builds true connection.
Seeing the ways we differ as sources of complementary wisdom, not flaws to be fixed, can revolutionize your relationship.



Questions for Conversation:
Think about a recent moment in your marriage where you felt triggered. What physical or emotional signals did your body give you, and how might noticing these earlier help you respond rather than react?
Consider a way your spouse differs from you that has caused tension. How could reframing that difference as complementary wisdom rather than a flaw shift your approach and deepen your connection?
TRIGGER CHALLENGE: Together, identify one habit or action that makes each of you feel safe and heard. Commit to practicing that habit in your interactions over the next week, then reflect on how it affected your connection.
 
Mentioned in this Episode:
 
Read The Road Less Triggered
 

Connect with Dr. Kelly Flanagan
 

Awesome Marriage is on Instagram!

Marriage need a reset so you can reconnect? This month's 4 Week Connection Challenge helps you and your spouse intentionally reconnect emotionally, physically, and spiritually—one simple, meaningful step at a time. Start closing the distance and rebuilding the intimacy you're longing for today.

Want an opportunity to dig into God's Word with your spouse? Find Awesome Marriage on YouVersion. You and your spouse differ and that's a good thing. Find out how to Celebrate Differences in Marriage, rather than allow them to divide.

If you haven't browsed our site, you've GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

Sign up for Dr. Kim's Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. Join now, just in time to receive our 4 Week Connection Challenge