The Anxious To Secure PODCAST

• 107: 10+ Ways you Secretly 🤫 increase your relationship anxiety UNKNOWINGLY (that are NOT even about him)

  જ⁀➴  (join 3K OTHERS!)  ➞ Take the 3min FREE Quiz:  https://themarriagecoach.outgrow.us/attachmentstyle3mquiz (Know your type so you do the right work)   10+ MICRO-HABITS That Increase Your Relationship Anxiety (Even When They Have NOTHING To Do With Your Relationship)  If you’re trying to go from anxious to secure, but you keep feeling on-edge for “no reason”… this episode is going to BLOW your mind. ★ These are the sneaky little habits that wire your nervous system into ALERT MODE before you even speak to him. And no  it’s not always your partner. Sometimes it’s your life, your routines, your tiny micro-stressors… and they make your anxious attachment feel LOUDER.    Think: waking up + grabbing your phone… scrolling emails before coffee… seeing a cute couple video that makes your chest tighten… or drinking coffee on an empty stomach that tricks your brain into panic mode. Your nervous system remembers old patterns. It fires BEFORE your mind even notices what’s going on. And suddenly his “I’ll call you later” feels like danger. ⛈️ Inside this episode, I walk you through 13 micro-habits that unknowingly spike your relationship anxiety and keep you stuck in anxious patterns even when your relationship is actually fine. And yes… I give you TINY homework at the end so you can actually create change and start becoming your secure, calm, grounded self NOW… not “one day.” 🖤✨ ★   Homework inside the episode: pick 3 habits → track your body → switch 1 thing → watch your anxiety soften. Tiny shifts = BIG emotional regulation. 📓✨       💛 Free Stuff Free Attachment Library (30+ worksheets, downloads, guides, flow-charts, prompts, videos, etc) ➞ https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach/shop Like the 💭 CHALLENGE 🔍 Your Thoughts - CHEAT SHEET To Stop Running On Autopilot   💎 Courses ON SALE: ✨ Stop *FINALLY* Obsessing Over Texts  (because YOU're BRIAN is the one creating YOUR anxiety, NOT how they communicate with you) ➞ Grab It Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety   ON SALE:  ✨ How to Stop OVERTHINKING Your Relationship in  only 4 Steps (With Your Avoidant Partner...because every minute you're imagining HIM leaving, you're manifesting it, as you're brain can't tell the difference between imagining and REAL.) ➞ Grab It Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/overthinkingcourse     💬 Work 1:1 with Me Personal Coaching (Shift anxious attachment & reclaim your energy) ➞ All offers: https://tr.ee/PInPmy WhatsApp Coaching (Daily support + check-ins straight to your phone) ➞ Start Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textandtalk   CHAPTERS: 00:00 Understanding Relationship Anxiety 02:23 Habit 01 03:20 Habit 02 04:29 Habit 03 05:03 Habit 04 05:55 Habit 05 06:44 Habit 06 09:49 Habit 07 10:52 Habit 08 12:11 Habit 09 13:43 Habit 10 15:07 Habit 11 *bonus 16:37 Habit 12 *bonus 17:16 Your HOMEWORK *to create REAL change and regulate       DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor. This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions. This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.   Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.  

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• 106: how to DETACH from someone you love, loved ⛓️‍💥🖤 (validation + outcomes) RE-MIX

  💛 Free Stuff Free Attachment Library (30+ worksheets, downloads, guides, flow-charts, prompts, videos, etc) ➞ https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach/shop Like the 💭 CHALLENGE 🔍 Your Thoughts - CHEAT SHEET To Stop Running On Autopilot   💎 Courses ON SALE:  ✨ Stop *FINALLY* Obsessing Over Texts  (because YOU're BRIAN is the one creating YOUR anxiety, NOT how they communicate with you) ➞ Grab It Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety   ON SALE:  ✨ How to Stop OVERTHINKING Your Relationship in  only 4 Steps (With Your Avoidant Partner...because every minute you're imagining HIM leaving, you're manifesting it, as you're brain can't tell the difference between imagining and REAL.) ➞ Grab It Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/overthinkingcourse     This episode blends my three most downloaded lessons on how to detach  from someone you love, from your ex, from the person whose approval you keep chasing, and from the outcomes that keep you anxious. Inside this replay you’ll get a mix of: ➞ how to detach from someone you love or loved ➞ how to stop chasing validation + approval ➞ how to detach from outcomes so your nervous system can breathe again If you’re stuck in that exhausting loop of: checking your phone waiting for a text replaying conversations craving reassurance attaching to their approval or feeling like your day depends on how someone else responds… …this episode will feel like a warm, honest reset.   Here’s what we go into together: ✶ why your brain stays attached even when YOU want to move on ✶ the belief that creates the most emotional pain ✶ 10 micro habits that make detachment feel doable, realistic, and natural ✶ how to communicate without spiraling or over-attaching ✶ why your anxiety has nothing to do with them and everything to do with your attachment system ✶ how to stop making everything personal ✶ how to choose your own approval first ✶ simple tools like the energy bubble, the validation vault, and the 30-second self check-in ✶ what real inner detachment looks like (without going cold or pretending you don’t care)   And I remind you of the truth: This isn’t about their reply speed, their energy, or their “mood.” This is about your anxious brain, your wiring, and your patterns  which YOU can change. If you want deeper support detaching from the obsessive thoughts, the texting anxiety, or the constant need for reassurance, both courses mentioned in this episode are still available in beta at a reduced price. You’ll get email support from me during the beta round too.     💬 Work 1:1 with Me Personal Coaching (Shift anxious attachment & reclaim your energy) ➞ All offers: https://tr.ee/PInPmy WhatsApp Coaching (Daily support + check-ins straight to your phone) ➞ Start Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textandtalk     CHAPTERS: 00:47 4 Steps to Detach emotionally from outcomes and people you love the most 35:07 How to detach from validation and others approval 1:09:15 How to detach from your EX (and people you loved)   DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor. This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions. This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.   Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.  

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• 105: MAIN character energy 👸🏻👀for anxious attachment: 12 steps to feeling secure in 2026

  ✨ Imagine you’re done waiting for someone else to decide your mood, your worth, or your story. You’re ready to step fully into Main Character Energy and lead your life with confidence, joy, and magic 🦄 In this episode, we break down how anxious attachment quietly pulls you into side-character mode and exactly how to flip the script 💛 Learn practical, everyday ways to own your energy, your choices, and your story...so you can feel powerful, magnetic, and fully YOU 🌙   🌟 What you’ll discover in this episode: Why your partner is just a chapter, not the whole book ✨ How to make tiny everyday actions feel cinematic and magical 13 practical rules to channel Main Character Energy immediately 💎 How to shift from anxious attachment to a secure, confident vibe Real-life examples and micro-moments to claim your power today   Think of your life like a movie 🎬 You’re the lead. You decide the plot. You control the energy. Not your partner. Not your past. Not anyone else 🦄 If you’re ready to stop reacting, stop shrinking, and show up fully as the main character of your life, this episode is your blueprint 🌙✨   💛 Free Stuff 🧠 Quick 3-min Attachment Quiz (Know your type so you do the right work) ➞ Take Quiz: https://themarriagecoach.outgrow.us/attachmentstyle3mquiz 🌙 Free Attachment Library (30+ worksheets, downloads, guides, flow-charts, prompts, videos, etc) ➞ https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach/shop   💎 Courses ON SALE: ✨ Stop *FINALLY* Obsessing Over Texts  (because YOU're BRIAN is the one creating YOUR anxiety, NOT how they communicate with you) ➞ Grab It Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety   ON SALE: ✨ How to Stop OVERTHINKING Your Relationship in  only 4 Steps (With Your Avoidant Partner...because every minute you're imagining HIM leaving, you're manifesting it, as you're brain can't tell the difference between imagining and REAL.) ➞ Grab It Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/overthinkingcourse   💬 Work 1:1 with Me 💎 Personal Coaching (Shift anxious attachment & reclaim your energy) ➞ All offers: https://tr.ee/PInPmy 📱 WhatsApp Coaching (Daily support + check-ins straight to your phone) ➞ Start Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textandtalk     CHAPTERS: 00:00 Understanding Anxious Attachment and Main Character Energy 01:35 Benefits of not being the side Character in your Story for your Anxious Attachment 03:16 Myth: "Main Character only works for Influencer or if you have time"" 06:36 Questions to Channel your MAIN CHARACTER energy 07:01 Secure Attachment And Main Character Energy 08:12 13 Practical Steps to Main Character Energy 08:36 Rule 01: Your partner is a chapter, not the entire book 09:10 Rule 02. Choose one signature thing. 09:50 Rule 03. Turn a boring household task into a movie scene. 10:53 Rule 04. Your inner voice is the “voiceover” of your movie 11:39 Rule 05. You are both actor and writer of your life 12:44 Rule 06. Give yourself a soundtrack 14:31 Rule 07. Romanticize the missing 15:56 Rule 08. Link your mood to a character instead of a flaw. 16:46 Rule 09. Add one cozy upgrade. 18:27 Rule 10. Walk like someone is watching your 19:08 Rule 11. Ask: “What would people on the couch SCREAM at you?" 20:26 Rule 12. Pause before reacting - see it like a chapter. 21:11 Key takeaways to remember         DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor. This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions. This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.   Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.  

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• 104: Put yourself FIRST this Christmas 🎄🎀 how DE-CENTERING your partner can actually bring you closer

  💛 Free Stuff Quick 3-min Attachment Quiz (Know your type so you do the right work) ➞ Take Quiz: https://themarriagecoach.outgrow.us/attachmentstyle3mquiz Free Attachment Library (30+ worksheets, downloads, guides, flow-charts, prompts, videos, etc) ➞ https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach/shop   💎 Courses ON SALE: ✨ Stop *FINALLY* Obsessing Over Texts  (because YOU're BRIAN is the one creating YOUR anxiety, NOT how they communicate with you) ➞ Grab It Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety   ON SALE: ✨ How to Stop OVERTHINKING Your Relationship in  only 4 Steps (With Your Avoidant Partner...because every minute you're imagining HIM leaving, you're manifesting it, as you're brain can't tell the difference between imagining and REAL.) ➞ Grab It Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/overthinkingcourse   💬 Work 1:1 with Me Personal Coaching (Shift anxious attachment & reclaim your energy) ➞ All offers: https://tr.ee/PInPmy WhatsApp Coaching (Daily support + check-ins straight to your phone) ➞ Start Here: https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textandtalk   Feeling anxious, overlooked, or way too focused on your partner this Christmas? 🎄 This episode shows you why putting yourself FIRST is the thing that actually brings your partner closer… not further away. If you’ve been carrying the whole holiday on your shoulders… If you’re replaying his texts… If you’re trying to “make Christmas perfect” so he doesn’t pull away… this is the episode you’ve been needing.  You’ll hear the truth about what happens when you stop centering him… and start centering YOU.   You’ll learn: 🎁 why your nervous system is so triggered during the holidays ☕️ why your anxious brain wants him to fix everything 🎄 how de-centering him stops the chasing cycle 🕯 how boundaries actually create connection 🧣 how micro-traditions make you feel grounded again 💛 why focusing on your own joy makes you more magnetic, not “selfish”   This is for you if you’re tired of: ✨ waiting for him to make plans ✨ walking on eggshells around his mood ✨ feeling like Christmas depends on how much he shows up ✨ shrinking yourself so you don’t “ruin the vibe” Inside this episode, you’ll get the deeper WHY behind all of it... the attachment science, the anxious-avoidant patterns, the nervous-system piece all explained in simple, calm, friend-to-friend language. ✨🧣 You’ll hear the exact steps to: ✨ regulate YOUR body first ✨ create micro-joy without waiting for him ✨ set boundaries without guilt ✨ build traditions that center you ✨ stop chasing, over-functioning, and people-pleasing   And yes… we talk about the magic part: how de-centering him is what actually makes him come closer. Not because you’re playing a game… but because you’re finally full, calm, grounded, and in your own power. ✨🎄 If you want a lighter Christmas… a calmer body… a deeper connection without pressure… and a relationship that feels less like survival mode… this episode is your reset. Let it play while you wrap gifts, take a walk in the cold air ❄️, light a candle, drink your warm coffee ☕️ and feel the pressure melt off your body little by little. And if this hits home and you want help healing your anxious attachment… my 1:1 coaching and entry-level offers are open. You don’t have to spend another Christmas feeling like you’re “not enough.”    CHAPTERS: 00:00 Putting Yourself First This Christmas 01:06 1. You can create magic without him 04:15 2. Boundaries are love 12:14 3. Regulate your nervous system first 13:36 4. Micro-traditions that center YOU 17:52 5. Decentering him actually brings you closer 19:19 Closing pep note     DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor. This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions. This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.   Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.  

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• 103: 7 things i’d NEVER do again if i DATED now as a secure woman 🍷💐 (what to do instead)

  …and the last one will shock you 7 Things I’d Do Differently If I Dated Now As a Secure Woman   How to STOP needing so much reassurance via text ❤️‍🩹📱 https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety   If you’ve ever met one guy on a dating app and your brain immediately built a whole 10-year love story in 48 hours… this episode is your new medicine. I’m breaking down the 7 things I would do completely differently if I dated again - now that I’m securely attached and no longer chasing crumbs 💋ྀིྀི Inside this episode, you’ll learn:   ★ Why dating multiple people at once keeps you in CHOICE instead of obsession ★ How dating slow protects you from falling for “potential” ★ The reason secure women show up authentic fast, instead of performing ★ Why I wait for emotional safety before ANY intimacy ★ How to actually date head over heart (and stop confusing chaos for chemistry) ★ What detached energy looks like when you’re not in scarcity anymore ★ Why keeping your life the main event makes you more attractive instantly ★ And the extra rule that would SHOCK old me: I don’t initiate or follow up after early dates - ever   If you want to attract a secure, emotionally available partner… If you’re tired of overthinking texts, panicking after dates, or getting attached to someone you barely know… If you want to date from your POWER and not your fear… This episode is your roadmap  I’m sharing real stories, client examples, and the exact shifts that turn anxious dating into secure dating. This isn’t fluffy advice. These are the rules that create healthy, grounded, actual connection — not fantasy bonds.   🌷✨ Listen now if you want to stop chasing chemistry and start choosing compatibility.   1:1 Coaching Offers (via video calls or whatsapp) https://tr.ee/PInPmy     Free Find your ANXIOUS Archetype NOW (to feel calmer) https://tr.ee/9s05-v9M30   Free: Anxious to Secure Checklist https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/anxioustosecurechecklist   FREE 3min Attachment Style QUIZ  https://themarriagecoach.outgrow.us/attachmentstyle3mquiz       🖤 💆🏻‍♀️ How to STOP needing so much reassurance via text (because safety comes from within, and you chasing or not settling boundary is the thing that give you anxiety, NOT a delayed text.) https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety     ▶️ Chapters: 00:00 Introduction to Secure Dating Tips 00:34 7 Secure dating Tips (from an EX Anxious Attachment Girly) 00:44 Dating tip #01 03:57 Dating Tip #02 06:44 Dating Tip #03 08:40 Dating Tip #04 09:55 Dating Tip #05 11:41 Dating Tips #06 13:41 Dating Tip #07 17:23 Bonus Dating Tip #08 22:06 Remember THIS     DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor. This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions. This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.   Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.   ON SALE: How to Stop OVERTHINKING Your Relationship in 4 Steps (With Your Avoidant Partner) https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/overthinkingcourse

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