Raising Boys & Girls

Emerson and Joy, a father and daughter, share how the bedtime stories Emerson told Joy became a children’s book set in the Land of Nuf. In it, a well-meaning Giggly named Beega puts his foot in his mouth, and his friend Dooga helps him make it right. At its heart are four questions to ask before speaking: Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary? Is it clear? There’s also the “Can we get a do-over?” phrase, which makes repair feel lighter and builds resilience instead of shame. They also talk about parents modeling repair and teaching kids to “assume the best until we hear the rest.” Joy shows what that looks like with a story about her daughter’s classmate whose unkindness came from grief.

Resources mentioned:

Beega Gets a Do-Over by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs & Joy Eggerichs Reed

Landofnuf.com

Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

Mother and Son: The Respect Effect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

Speak Your Mind by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

Love and Respect in the Family by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

Get to the Publishing Punchline by Joy Eggerichs Reed

Writing With Bernard the Baguette: A Kid’s Fun and Silly Guide to Discover the Joys of Writing by Joy Eggerichs Reed

Punchline Agency (Joy’s agency)

Capable by Sissy Goff and David Thomas

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Sissy and David continue the Capable series with problem-solving, opening with a few all-too-familiar parenting “word problems” and a reminder that efficiency isn’t always the goal; capability is. They walk through five ideas from the chapter: create room for critical thinking, let kids make low-stakes decisions, ask more and instruct less, hold family meetings, and review progress. To figure out how much to help, they suggest asking “what is the least amount of help that helps this child move forward?” Their challenge for the week is to pick one recurring family problem and solve it together, and before you solve anything, ask one more question.

Resources mentioned

Capable by Sissy Goff and David Thomas

Research on executive function and parenting (cognitive stimulation, language that helps kids think, scaffolding and autonomy support), plus a study of preschoolers linking meaningful choices to stronger executive functioning

. . . . . .

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Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

THE BIBLE RECAP: Shop 35% off through November with code

RBG at bakerbookhouse.com.

CHRISTIAN HEALTHSHARE MINISTRIES: Take charge of your healthcare by visiting chministries.org/solution.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

AG1: Go to DrinkAG.com/RBG and get a free Immune Support Bundle, including a bottle of Omega-3 fish oil and a bottle of Vitamin D3K2, with your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro.

ADVENTURE BIBLE: Get an Adventure Bible for your child and begin reading and exploring it together to build confidence and curiosity in God’s Word https://tinyurl.com/RBGAdventureBible.

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After years of coaching thousands of women, Jess noticed that everyone she knows is scared, so she set out to understand fear biblically, physiologically, and practically. Her biggest takeaway is that the most scared person in the room can also be the bravest. She says naming a fear “is 90%,” and that kids need room to name their fears and also need to see their parents name their own. She tells parents to let go of the shame of over-rescuing and to remember they don’t want to save their kids from the story God has for them. She also shares a fresh reading of Eve adding “we can’t even touch it” to God’s command, and uses it to warn parents against making God sound tougher than He is. Her one simple practice is to “greet courage out loud”: when a child is shaking before a test or putting on a backpack while terrified, say back to them, “Look at you, you are so brave.”

Resources mentioned:

You Can’t Be Brave Until You’re Scared: A Call for Courageous Women to Face Fear, Fight Anxiety, and Awaken Holy Awe by Jess Connolly

Tired of Being Tired and What Comes Next by Jess Connolly

The Jess Connolly Podcast

Find Jess: @jessaconnolly on social and jessconnolly.com.

. . . . . .

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Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

AG1: Go to DrinkAG.com/RBG and get a free Immune Support Bundle, including a bottle of Omega-3 fish oil and a bottle of Vitamin D3K2, with your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro.

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The episode moves the Capable series from strengths to skills, which are things kids have to be taught and practice, like tying their shoes. Managing emotions comes first. Sissy and David ask parents to notice their own reflex when a child is upset. Are they a fixer, a matcher, a minimizer, or a regulator? They point to research on co-regulation showing that kids borrow an adult’s steadiness before they can calm themselves. From there they walk through the steps: name the feeling (“name it to tame it”), validate it without approving the behavior, and skip the lecture while a child’s “downstairs brain” is in charge. A code word chosen ahead of time and a family list of 20 calming strategies both help. One memorable example is a fifth grader who prayed through the alphabet to fall asleep. The episode ends with a “try this at home” challenge for parents to notice their own patterns and to ask their kids, “What helps your feelings not feel quite so big?”

Resources mentioned:

Strong and Smart by David Thomas

I Am Capable by David Thomas and Sissy Goff

The Daystar Dog series by David Thomas and Sissy Goff

Feelings Chart

Dan Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson’s “upstairs and downstairs brain” model

A 2024 systematic review on parent–child co-regulation

A meta-analysis of 53 studies linking parents’ emotion regulation to their children’s

A brain imaging study on affect labeling (naming an emotion lowered activity in the amygdala)

. . . . . .

Sign up to receive the⁠ bi-⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monthly newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share!

Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

AG1: Go to DrinkAG.com/RBG and get a free Immune Support Bundle, including a bottle of Omega-3 fish oil and a bottle of Vitamin D3K2, with your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro.

CHRISTIAN HEALTHSHARE MINISTRIES: Take charge of your healthcare by visiting chministries.org/solution.

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Sissy and David sit down in New York with Craig Melvin to talk about his book Pops, a love letter to his father, who is now in recovery after 15 years of addiction. Craig shares how growing up with an absent dad made him and his wife Lindsay put being present first, even though they sometimes overcorrect. His reminder to his family is “if everything is special, nothing is special.” He talks about helping his kids find their people, and about how years of covering tragedy taught him that the hills and valleys are what build resilience. He hopes his kids will someday remember the awkward bedtime talks and beach walks more than the big VIP moments.

Resources mentioned:

Pops: Learning to Be a Son and a Father by Craig Melvin

I’m Proud of You by Craig Melvin

Glass Half Full with Craig Melvin

Dads Got This! Craig Melvin’s show

. . . . . .

Sign up to receive the⁠ bi-⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monthly newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share!

Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

AG1: Go to DrinkAG.com/RBG and get a free Immune Support Bundle, including a bottle of Omega-3 fish oil and a bottle of Vitamin D3K2, with your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro.

CHRISTIAN HEALTHSHARE MINISTRIES: Take charge of your healthcare by visiting chministries.org/solution.

THE ABSORPTION COMPANY: Visit absorbmore.com and use code RBG for up to 35% off your first order.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices