The Car That Rebuilt Us
Who doesn’t like stories, especially ones that inspire us? In this episode you’re going to hear the true story about a father, a son, a clunker car and a 5,000-mile road trip that rebuilt their relationship.Ruchin Kansal is a leadership educator, advisor. But I’ve brought him on the program because he’s the co-author of The Kansal Clunker: The Car That Rebuilt Us. His Son Neil Kansal is a certified EMT and lifelong car enthusiast, he rebuilt his first clunker at sixteen and drove it to the highest motorable road in America.To learn more about The Kansal Clunker or to purchase the book, visit: https://www.thekansalclunker.com/Special thanks to Smile Online Course & Books for sponsoring this episode. To learn more visit: https://thefatherhoodchallenge--smileteenskills.thrivecart.com/social-career-skills-accelerator/Create your podcast today! #madeonzencastrhttps://zencastr.com/?via=thefatherhoodchallenge00:14.50Jonathan GuerreroWho doesn't like stories, especially ones that inspire us? In just a moment, you're going to hear the true story about a father and son, a clunker car, and a 5,000-mile road trip that rebuilt their relationship. So don't go anywhere, right?00:30.65Jonathan GuerreroGreetings, everyone. Thank you so much for joining me in this episode called The Car That Rebuilt Us. Let me start by introducing my two guests. Ruxin Kansal is a leadership educator advisor, but I brought him on the program because he's the co-founder of the Kassal Clunker, the car that rebuilt us.00:49.85Jonathan GuerreroHis son, Neil Kassal, is a certified EMT and lifelong car enthusiast. He rebuilt his first clunker at 16 and drove it to the highest memorable road in America. Ruxian Neal, welcome to the Fatherhood Challenge.01:04.54Ruchin KansalThank you for having us, Jonathan. It's really a pleasure.01:07.69Neil Kansaland Thanks, Jonathan.01:09.33Jonathan GuerreroSo here's my favorite question to both of you. What is your favorite dad joke?01:16.40Neil KansalYeah, well, dad, fitting you start with this one, I'd say.01:19.62Ruchin Kansalyeah the You know what? Neil just had his heat break down and he called, Dad, I'm cold. And I said, yeah, go stand in the corner. It's 90 degrees there.01:34.78Neil Kansaloh man, these aren't that old, do they?01:42.97Jonathan GuerreroI love that one.01:46.58Jonathan GuerreroAll right. Well, let's jump into it. Ruchin, Neil, why don't you both start by telling us about your professional careers?01:55.62Ruchin KansalNeel, you want to go first?01:57.29Neil KansalYeah, sure. I can get started. I guess mine's significantly shorter than his is. Uh, so I'm a recent college graduate. I graduated from a Washington and Lee university in Virginia this past May studying biology and data science.02:10.91Neil KansalAnd I recently kicked off my career as an analyst um at Deloitte working for the state of Kentucky um and the assistance programs here. um so I guess just a little bit more about me.02:23.44Neil Kansalah My whole life, I've been a builder. I've loved building things. I've loved fixing things. I've taken apart my mom's kitchen appliances, um you know much to her disappointment at various times in my life.02:35.46Neil Kansalof02:38.02Neil KansalSo, you know, I've always loved to build things and that's kind of where we got to our whole console clunker project, um which you all hear about more today. um But apart from building, I played the cello my whole life. I'm a certified EMT ah and, you know, throughout school and after I've tried to build an impact by leading organizations that can create change.03:00.01Neil Kansalum ah whether that's being a student leader in orchestras or founding programs that deliver medical assistance to those in need.03:11.37Neil Kansalum And, you know, something I'm trying to carry on forward with my life.03:16.29Jonathan GuerreroYou said you play the cello. That piques my interest because I also play the cello. I've played in orchestras and I did not know that about you.03:23.32Neil KansalOh, wow.03:26.83Jonathan GuerreroThat's really, really cool. And you said you've been playing all of your life.03:29.13Neil KansalYeah. Yeah. Yeah, my parents started me early. I think I was around three years old when I started playing the cello.03:36.92Jonathan GuerreroThat's really, really cool. Yeah, that that has a special place with me.03:42.48Neil KansalHow long have you been playing?03:42.55Jonathan GuerreroThe cello for me is is a voice. It's become almost like an extension of my body. If I could sing, that's what it would sound like.03:51.20Neil KansalYou know, a lot of people actually say that. um And there's a quote, and i I cannot remember who this is by, but it it was talking about how the cello is the most close replica to a human voice out of the instrument families.04:05.32Jonathan GuerreroYes. So true. So true. That was really cool.04:12.16Jonathan GuerreroWell, what is the story behind how you both got into CARS?04:18.01Ruchin KansalMaybe I will get a started and Neil can add in. I mean, like Neil, I'm also a builder. I love building. I started out as an architect building movie theaters and then built large organizations, you know, so that they can adapt to change.04:36.52Ruchin KansalAnd right now I teach undergrads, MBA students and executives so that they can really, you know, build their futures. However, my best build project has been the Kansal Klunker, you know, the car that but rebuilt us.04:51.78Ruchin KansalAnd the way we got to it is, i mean, when I was growing up, my favorite TV show, I grew up in India, my favorite TV show was watching cars race in the Himalayan car rally.04:58.87Neil KansalThank you.05:06.03Ruchin KansalAnd, you know, you'll see all of these exotic cars racing through the Himalayas on dirt roads. And, you know, I just wanted to do that. And I started to tinker with my parents' cars.05:17.57Ruchin KansalAnd then I got to drive through the Himalayas and that was wonderful. And then I came to the US and I bought my first car, even though I was still a graduate assistant with, you know, very limited income.05:28.81Ruchin KansalBut I bought a brand new car because it, for me, meant, you know, freedom and control. So freedom on one side and control on the other side. and And so cars just have been part of our DNA. And Neil, I don't know if you want to say anything more.05:44.08Neil KansalYeah, well, I mean, you heard from my dad right there ah with that deep rooted love of cars. And growing up, he kind of brought that to me, whether it was you know buying me my vast collection of Hot Wheels cars and you know sitting on the floor playing with them with me.05:58.75Neil Kansalum Or ah when I was really little, I refused to eat a meal unless I was seated behind the driver's seat of my dad's car, yeah car shows.06:07.42Jonathan GuerreroThat's so cool.06:08.90Neil KansalAll of those things.06:08.95Ruchin KansalThank you.06:09.66Neil KansalSo, you know, cars have always been kind of the thing that connects us. And I think that's why from the start, I've been very interested in them as well. You know, when I got my license 16, it felt pretty life changing. That'd been the one moment I've been looking forward to my whole life.06:25.40Neil KansalAnd I can resonate with his points regarding, ah you know, the freedom and the control it brings you and the ability to do what you want to do when you want to do.06:34.62Jonathan Guerreroa Yeah, that's really powerful. I'm at that place with my oldest son. he is old enough to get his permit and he is excited about learning to drive.06:46.00Jonathan GuerreroAnd it's it's kind of a special moment teaching him the ropes of how to drive. And I've been very adamant that my goal is to turn him into a better driver than me. And I consider that a pretty hard high Yeah.06:58.88Jonathan Guerrerofor07:01.67Ruchin KansalThat's a good bar to break, right? I mean, if you but if your kids can do better, even better.07:04.15Jonathan GuerreroYes.07:07.94Jonathan GuerreroIf he's better than me, then I know he'll be safer.07:10.87Ruchin KansalYes, that's wonderful.07:14.26Jonathan GuerreroSo what is it about a car that made your relationship stronger?07:21.52Ruchin KansalNeil, you want to start?07:22.88Neil KansalSure. Yeah. So, I mean, We started this Kunso Clunker project in the midst of you know the COVID-19 shutdown ah when we were all locked up at home and you know needing some outlet to do something.07:36.66Neil Kansalum And COVID-19 was a time of like a lot of conflict. you know People weren't really talking to each other. um And that had a lot of impacts on people socially and just you know how we were all feeling.07:48.16Neil Kansalum So I think having the Kunso Clunker as a project ah for my dad and I gave us the opportunity or not necessarily even the opportunity, but forced us to be together in a room in our garage or outside, you know, all day, every day. we were working on this car.08:04.38Neil Kansalum We were solving problems. We were, you know, arguing. It wasn't always with peachy, of course. um But what it really did was open up kind of a constant dialogue between the two of us and our conversations, yes, were about cars, but started to grow from that, you know, talking about our lives, what's going on.08:23.05Neil Kansalbut Listening to music, you know, me showing him music that he may not and have enjoyed as much, ah you know, things like that. So just, I think it gave us the opportunity to spend a lot of quality time together. And that really changed how the two of us work. I kind of think we have almost an unspoken dialogue now um where we can pretty much tell what the other person's thinking, just being around them.08:43.93Neil KansalI think that's really cool.08:46.63Ruchin KansalYeah, and I mean, that that is very well said. And for me, you know, my jobs always kept me away from home um when he was growing up.08:54.47Neil Kansalbut08:55.61Ruchin KansalAnd COVID kind of forced us to be at home together. And my wife, his mother is a physician. So she was on the front lines at the hospital dealing with the COVID patients. But yeah ah we were at home and and this was truly a blessing because now we were there.09:13.37Ruchin KansalWe were together, there was no one else around us and we had all the time you could have wished for. And, you know, it is amazing when you really start to be with your kids and you start to be with them doing fun things.09:29.23Ruchin Kansalah It is amazing how much you start to talk to each other, how much you start to learn about each other. You know, it's, I mean, another dad joke will be right. I mean, ah ah once a teenager's head is under the hood, they speak everything.09:43.33Ruchin KansalBut it it really really is, right? i mean, it was building trust. It was building, ah you know, a lot of trust between the two of us, just having that dialogue. and And I think that has changed the relationship to what Neil said. Now we kind of know what other person is thinking even without them saying anything.10:02.89Jonathan GuerreroAre there any values that you both learned through this journey together?10:09.80Ruchin KansalYeah. So for me, the values that I learned, one is family for sure, right? I mean, there is nothing stronger than a family. Number two, listening.10:22.31Ruchin KansalWe have stopped listening. And I think it is very important to open up our ears and listen because everyone is trying to do the right thing.10:32.66Ruchin KansalAnd if you listen, you can come to common terms. And I would also say having fun, right? I mean, Just everything is not always rosy and not always comfortable and always good.10:45.55Ruchin KansalBut despite that, if you can have fun, ah it makes everything so much more easier. So those are the values for me.10:56.98Neil KansalAnd yeah, I can echo those values.10:57.08Jonathan GuerreroNeil, what about you?10:59.90Neil KansalI agree with what he said. I think a really important thing I learned in that process was the importance of you know collaborative communication um and that that can look like a lot of different things.11:11.02Neil KansalCollaborative communication can be arguing. you know It can be sitting there you know saying, like what are you talking about? ah like how how how is that ever going to work?11:21.88Neil Kansalum And you know there are ways to go about it, but at the end of the day, being comfortable with actually having that dialogue and saying what you think is the only way to get past real challenges and being afraid to say what you want to say, um you know, will make it very difficult to actually overcome.11:43.41Neil KansalSo, you know, listening and communication in that sense together.11:43.67Jonathan GuerreroWhat is11:47.89Jonathan Guerrerowhat is the background behind your book? What drove you to write it? And what do you want readers to gain from your book?11:56.39Ruchin Kansalah One of the things I really enjoy is writing. I'm and i'm an author. I have books published. I have edited magazine. And I've always enjoyed writing. And when we were kind of done with the first Klunker project and the centric Klunker project, I was like, there is a good story to tell here. Why don't we try to write it?12:18.91Ruchin Kansaland And so that gave the idea of why don't we write a book? And at the same time, Neil was in college and going to be a away now for a job. And so we could not be at home building a car together.12:32.09Ruchin KansalBut working on a book together gave us a chance to continue to work together as well. So despite the distance, you know, we were still working on a clunker, now a book. So, you know, it has been, I think that that was the idea. And, you know,12:48.46Ruchin KansalI would say what that tells us and tells everyone is that distance is not a reason for not having a connection. And distance is not a reason for not collaborating. you Distance can be filled with the mindset that we can still work together. And I think that's one of the messages we want our readers to take away.13:13.81Jonathan GuerreroNeil, what about you?13:15.30Neil KansalSure, I'll throw another one on there. And I think this one's really important. And it's to not take yourself too seriously. And that's one thing that I've tried to make come through in that book very clearly, at least in the sections that are from my perspective, which is, you know, we make mistakes, we do dumb things, funny things happen.13:33.35Neil Kansalum But it's good to have a laugh about it and move on. And so, you know, I hope that people can laugh at our mistakes. They can laugh at our story. you know, they can have a good time reading it. And then they can take that same laughter and apply it to themselves.13:46.45Neil KansalGo, okay, hey, they did that. I did this. We all make mistakes. Hey, that's funny. ah let mean Let me give it a good laugh and let let's move on. and so I think that's kind of my main message that i think um I've tried to highlight in this book.14:01.94Jonathan GuerreroWell, speaking of highlights, please share bits of your favorite parts or adventures from the book.14:09.39Neil KansalSure. I can take this one first. Um, so there's one moment very early on in this book, you know, we've just bought our clunker, uh, and we've driven it home and it's sitting in our driveway.14:12.08Ruchin Kansalyou14:21.75Neil Kansalah My dad and I are sitting on a rock next to it, staring at it. Uh, and it's a moment of realization for us that, okay, we just bought this thing, but like, what do we do? Like, we don't know how to do any of this.14:36.10Neil KansalWe don't even know where to start. um And I think that's, you know, a very vulnerable moment in the book. And it really highlights that it's okay not to know what to do. um And that it's always a starting point.14:49.56Neil Kansalum So I think that's one kind of key memory there that has stuck with me. It's if I don't know what to do, you know, get started, start doing something and your path will come clearer to you. um Another, you know, key more of an adventure I wanted to highlight, which I think is pretty funny, um is my dad has this affinity for finding the most random attractions on our road trips.15:12.01Ruchin KansalThank15:12.41Neil Kansalum So, you know, we saw ah the Trout Museum on this first Conkler trip. And it's moments like these where, you know, you see something um that just seems so absurd to you. There's a giant, you know, 20-foot trout.15:28.86Neil Kansalum15:31.57Neil KansalIt brings some humility to everything you're doing. ah And that humility, you know, as much as I might have been, oh, why are we stopping to see a trout? You know, that humility really did keep us going on these trips. I think those are are a couple key moments for me.15:46.40Ruchin KansalYeah, um I mean, there are so many moments that were you know excellent, including the time we got to the top, just getting to the top and the feeling that we have when you are at the top of the mountain and you have completed the trip. But there were a few that i that keep you know replaying in my mind. And one of those was very early on in the trip. We had just seen one of those, you know,16:15.80Ruchin Kansalwonderful things in Cleveland with which is called the world's largest rubber stamp and now we are driving towards Michigan and on the way it starts to rain and suddenly the sky opens up and then there are these signs for Kelly's Island and suddenly the clunker the taggy our car decides that it wants to go to Kelly's Island on a boat and we could not say no to the taggy because she wanted to go on the boat And so we just drove Tegi to the ship, which took it to Kelly's Island, which is largest US island on Lake Erie. And it is known for the ah glacial grooves on on the limestone that's on the island.17:00.03Ruchin Kansaland And so, you know, just an impromptu thing, but it was so wonderful to see that, you know, sometimes when things are not planned and you do them, It is such a wonderful feeling.17:11.40Ruchin KansalThere was another one, you know, the car had a little mishap when we were in Upper Michigan and we had to pull it alongside the road to fix it. And we are standing by the mailbox of this house in wilderness.17:23.62Ruchin KansalAnd this person walks out with all of his tools and starts to help us in middle of nowhere. and And that tells you, right, people care about people. they They want to be there for you. They want to help you.17:36.09Ruchin KansalHowever, I think the most exciting one, the most Zen experience for me in all of this was when we drove the Iron in Mountain Road. So Iron Mountain Road, it's about 16 miles between Custer State Park and Mount Rushmore.17:50.67Ruchin KansalAnd it is one of the 15 technical roads in the US. It's like 314 curves, three pigtails, three tunnels. One of them perfectly frames Mount Rushmore. You know, a lot of curves. So a technical road is a road that is designed for you to drive slow.18:06.41Ruchin Kansalnot fast, so you can experience what's around you. And we were on that road at 5 a.m. You know, the sun was rising, the air was crisp, the wildflowers were around us.18:19.35Ruchin KansalAnd then just, you know, driving the car on that road, experiencing, ah seeing Mount Rushmore coming out of a tunnel. I think that was one of the most Zen experiences for me, at least still on this trip.18:35.44Jonathan GuerreroThat's really cool. Thank you for sharing that with us. If you're ever around Iowa, there I live about 15 minutes or so away from Brandon, which Brandon is the home to the largest frying pan in the world.18:52.03Neil Kansalyes Yeah.18:55.83Ruchin Kansalyeah you see ah come there We have seen world's largest blueberry. We have seen world's largest lobster. we have seen world's largest axe, world's largest trout. We have to see the world's largest frying pan.19:08.47Jonathan GuerreroIt's true. It's right out there. You go right by the town, the um city hall building, and it's it's right there in in front for everyone to see. it Like, you can't miss it. If you take the main road in town, you go to a T intersection and it's right there in front of you.19:26.77Jonathan GuerreroIt's huge.19:29.20Ruchin KansalSee, those are the things you remember, Neil, right? I mean, even though they were the most irritating things.19:35.53Neil KansalYeah, you definitely remember them.19:39.08Ruchin Kansalah19:42.18Jonathan GuerreroIf you each could change one thing from your life story, what would it be and why?19:50.48Ruchin KansalThat's that a tough one. i mean, if I think back to my life, right, not everything was always... as I wanted at the same time i will not change anything because if it wasn't for those things I would not be who I am um so you know i mean there in everyone's life in my life there were but periods of lot of achievement and growth and and and happiness there were lot of periods of you know ah what am I doing why is it happening to me20:22.98Neil KansalThank you.20:29.08Ruchin KansalWhy does it have happened happened to me? But everything has taught me something and everything has made me who I am. So, no, I would not change anything, actually.20:43.92Ruchin KansalYeah, I mean, yeah, I would not change anything. I've been blessed with a good life.20:50.16Jonathan GuerreroNeil, what about you?20:52.38Neil KansalYeah, I mean, I'm 22 years old. I can't say I've lived all that much life. um But, you know, I've had a lot of blessings, you know, a wonderful family, wonderful experiences, wonderful people have surrounded me.21:05.81Neil Kansalum And, you know, I'm very thankful for all of that. But, you know, if i if I ever come to a point where I think there's something I wanted to have changed, I'll come back and let you know.21:18.56Jonathan GuerreroThat is a great answer. um and I just want to be clear with our audience. so When I did your introduction, both of you have a very long list of achievements. You're both high achieving adults.21:34.28Jonathan GuerreroAnd um we didn't really spend a lot of time in that. it And of course, when when you guys talked about your, when you each talked about your accomplishments, You did highlight some of those achievements that that you've done, but the list is quite long.21:49.25Jonathan GuerreroBut what I find interesting is what I'm gathering from everything we've just talked about is what's given meaning to your life isn't those accomplishments. Not that they aren't meaningful, but what makes all of the accomplishments the most meaningful is that you've been on this journey together.22:10.96Jonathan GuerreroAnd without the relationship that the two of you have, the accomplishments are dwarfed in meaning. But with the relationship that the two of you have, it's it's that where that draws the most meaning. This is where you're wealthy.22:28.96Jonathan GuerreroThis is where you're so rich. And then everything else, the accomplishments that you've had in life, is is just the bonus to your life. Does that about sum it up?22:43.56Ruchin KansalYeah, i mean, I think you have summarized it very well. um you always measure wealth in terms of material things and money.22:55.61Ruchin Kansalah However, true wealth is relationships and community because that allows you to really tide over anything else that's happening in life. So, yeah, I mean, frankly, i had not thought of it that way.23:12.98Ruchin KansalBut as you said it, it is very true. i think the biggest wealth we have, Neil and I, Neil a and his mom and our extended family is is the relationship, the strength of the relationship. Not that we don't fight, not that we don't cry, and not that we don't you know want to kill each other one day.23:34.37Ruchin KansalBut at the same time, is exactly it is it is it is exactly that that keeps us feel blessed and rich.23:45.19Ruchin KansalI mean, Neil, I don't know what, I know he you may, it's not you, but any any thoughts?23:51.26Neil KansalYou know, no I mean, I absolutely agree. And I think i don't know if I ever thought about it that way either. um i think that might just be a concept that's been ingrained in me pretty naturally, having been raised the way I was, um you know, with my parents. And like i have very close relationships with my grandparents and other extended family.24:09.84Neil Kansalum And, you know, it's conversations with everybody that really keeps me going. It's the encouragement or the, hey, that's a really dumb idea. And then I do it anyway, and it turns out to be a really dumb idea. You know, those things go.24:24.35Jonathan GuerreroI can relate to that.24:28.34Jonathan GuerreroWell, okay. The next question's a trivial one. It's definitely for car guys out there. What are each of your top four favorite cars and why if money were not an issue?24:44.53Neil KansalAll right. um you know I might not resonate with everybody on these answers, but you know my favorite cars are the ones that people don't really think about or don't really like that much.24:57.73Neil Kansalum But you know in my mind, nothing beats a car that you've built yourself. Nothing beats a car that you've customized and personalized to be your own.25:09.47Neil Kansalum And so I guess... giving you a list of top four cars a really difficult thing for me because, you know, yes, cars are cars and they're incredible machines. And I love cars and yes, fast cars are really cool.25:22.62Neil Kansalum But cars, you know, aren't just cars to me, right? They have that extra layer of meaning. um and pride that go with them. um And so, you know, like our Acura Integra, we built that thing up from scratch. That has to be one of my favorite cards of all time because nothing beats driving a car where you know everything about it and you understand everything about how it works and you almost have a relationship with that car in that sense.25:50.22Neil KansalSo I know I didn't really answer your question, but I don't know if I can, in all honesty.25:54.84Jonathan GuerreroI still think that's a good answer.25:58.63Jonathan GuerreroRichie, what is your, what are your thoughts?26:01.08Ruchin KansalYeah, I mean,26:04.76Ruchin Kansalah like Neil, know, i love cars. We love going to auto shows. And we are always looking for, you know, the newest, the meanest, ah the one with the most technical features in it kind of cars, right? And then we have test-driven exotic cars and and American cars and trucks and everything.26:27.42Ruchin KansalBut if I think back to my three favorite, four favorite cars, actually, i you know, it's none of the cars we have seen. My four favorite cars, number one, is my grandfather's ambassador with red seats in it. And when I was like two years old, I would just, you know, it was a big car and I would just, you know, it was like a Morris Austin and it was so beautiful.26:51.03Ruchin KansalThat's the car I remember. The second car I remember is my dad's Fiat. And then it was blue, sky blue. ah When I was in high school, I was tinkering with it. I put in a new, you know, audio system in it and and stuff like that.27:06.94Ruchin KansalSo that is the second car I remember in terms of the cars that are my favorite. The third one, of course, is Teggy. It was a labor of love. where You know, Neil and I built it with our own hands and then drove it. And, ah you know, I think one of the biggest mistakes we made is we sold it.27:25.52Ruchin KansalBut, you know, it is what it is. And then the fourth one, the one we still have, is our second clunker, which is a 1983 Alfa Romeo Spider, ah which we bought again, you know, from basically a chef ah who wanted to get rid of it and brought it home and again did the same process, you know, stripped it down, rebuilt it, and drove it to the easternmost point in North America, which is Cape Spear in Newfoundland, Canada.27:54.15Ruchin Kansaland And, you know, that car is more of a clunker than Tegi ever was. It's called Alpha. I mean, it leaks everywhere. It smells everywhere. You know, we have duct taped so many exhaust pipes in that, you know, you can't even imagine how it runs.28:12.35Ruchin KansalBut those are the cars I am proud of and I know Neil is proud of. So, right, it's so it's not the big names. It's not the expensive cars. It's the cars that have a personality and they have a personality because you have ah kind of, you know, built the personality along with them.28:31.78Ruchin KansalAnd that's why we say a car that rebuilt us because each of those cars have rebuilt who we are, not that we just want a car and we're happy about it.28:41.15Jonathan GuerreroWhere is God in both of your stories?28:48.35Ruchin KansalYou know, I think God is always there. um God shows up when you least expect God to show up. i In context of this story, I think God showed up in form of the nurse who29:07.49Ruchin Kansalliterally rescued the family, the part of the family that was in an accident coming down Mount Evans. So, I mean, we don't want, you know, ah the listeners may not have read the book,29:18.15Jonathan Guerreroyou29:22.31Ruchin KansalBut one of the key moments in the book is when we were coming down Mount Evans, we had three cars and one of the car had my cousin, her husband, ah my younger son's two kids in that car. And that car swerved off the mountain and overturned.29:42.31Ruchin KansalAnd it could have fallen in the valley. Thankfully, it was on the side of the mountain. And they were the car behind them was... a car that was being driven by a nurse and the nurse had the little hammer that you can break the windshield with and she did that and pulled everyone out of the car and everyone you know i mean looking at the pictures of the accident will be like nobody can survive everyone escaped with not even a scratch so I think that God was there on the mountain I think God was there in that nurse I think God was there with us all the time we don't30:11.67Jonathan GuerreroWow.30:17.49Ruchin Kansalthink about God, you know, all the time, but personally for me, I can recount so many experiences when, you know, God just showed up for us.30:27.47Jonathan GuerreroFor sure. Wow. That is powerful.30:34.44Jonathan GuerreroNeil, what about you?30:36.53Neil KansalYeah, i I think I echo that statement that God is a silent partner, you know, in my life, in our lives. um And, you know, and in everyone's lives, whether or not they believe.30:47.34Neil Kansalum30:49.97Neil Kansalah You know, I mean, i may not think about God every day. i don't pray every day. i don't, you know, fit the temple as much as I should. um But, you know, I understand that there's some higher order out there um that's looking out for me. And I think just having that faith that there is that order looking out for me drives me to make decisions um and it drives me to be the best self that I can be and to do the things knowing that, you know, there's something out there that has my back.31:24.49Jonathan GuerreroHow can dads find the Casale Clunker, the car that rebuilt us, and how can they get ah their own copy?31:31.93Neil KansalYeah, so ah our book, The Council Clunker, The Car That Rebuilt Us, can be found pretty much anywhere online that you can buy a book, whether that be Amazon.com Barnes & Noble.31:43.26Neil Kansalum You can also read more about our book and learn more about it at our website, thecunsoleclunker.com. And if you want to you know get an idea of what people are saying about the book and see if it's really for you, which it definitely is, um you can visit us on Goodreads if you look up the title of our book.31:58.09Ruchin KansalThank you.32:01.62Neil KansalAgain, that is The Kunsoll Clunker, The Car That Rebuilt Us by Ruchin and Neil Kunsoll.32:07.11Jonathan GuerreroAnd just to make things easier, if you go to thefatherhoodchallenge.com, that's thefatherhoodchallenge.com. If you go to this episode, look right below the episode description, and you're looking for the episode title, The Car That Rebuilt Us.32:24.52Jonathan GuerreroThe Car That Rebuilt Us. Look right below the episode description. I will have all of the links posted right there for your convenience. Ruchin, Neil, as we close, what is your challenge to dads listening now?32:41.76Ruchin KansalYou know, I did not know this till very recently, but what I recently found out is 85 to 90% of the time we'll ever spend with our kids is spent with them by the time they finish high school.33:01.73Ruchin KansalSo let me say that again. 85 to 90% of the time we will ever spend with our kids is done by the time they finish high school.33:15.98Ruchin KansalWhat does that mean to you? For me, that means I am so lucky that when Neil was in high school, I actually got to spend a year with him because if I was living my life as I was, yes, we had quality time when I was home on weekends and we had fun and laughter.33:36.40Ruchin KansalBut imagine if my 90% of the time with him was only the weekends.33:42.26Ruchin KansalSo if you are with your kids and they are not grown up yet, hold them tight. Spend as much time as you can with them.33:55.73Ruchin KansalListen to them.33:58.50Ruchin KansalGrow with them. Have fun with them. Mold them, shape them, but also know they can shape you. And then just embrace that, right? Because once high school is gone, they will still be there for you, but they are now adults and you'll get maybe 10 to 15% more of the entire time you'll spend with them ever. So you take advantage of of you the kids that you have at home and and love them and do what you can embrace them and then seriously learn and grow from them because I've learned so much from them.34:35.13Jonathan GuerreroNeil, what about you?34:37.59Neil KansalYeah, I think this is a lesson that I've really learned from my dad. um But, you know, your kids, when they're 13 through 16, 17, 18 years old, might not want to, you know, be spending all their time with their parents.34:44.45Ruchin Kansalyou34:51.66Neil Kansalum That's a very normal thing that, you know, every kid goes through. um and so I would say, you know, a challenge to dads, I guess, um is to make the effort on your end.35:03.44Neil KansalAnd my dad did that with me and you know we've been blessed with that. I'm so thankful he did. um And we got to build that relationship. So I guess what I'm saying is, you know reach out um and make the effort on your side because you know down the line, we're going to appreciate that you did.35:24.32Jonathan GuerreroRichan, Neil, thank you so much. thank to Thank you to both of you for being on the Fatherhood Challenge, for sharing your story with us, and for sharing your wisdom. ah really appreciate it35:36.13Ruchin KansalThank you so much, Jonathan, for having us on the show and for such a candid and thoughtful conversation. And and we really do hope that all the dads out there and then all the sons out there ah build their own life that is you know a good life for them.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/thefatherhoodchallengepodcast/donations
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